That moment I decided I had to stop comparing myself

Last night was our choir performance at the Lakes Lutheran Church. I had a solo. As the concert was starting, I looked out across the small congregation of people that had come together to hear us. I wondered how many were there because they wanted to, and how many of them were there simply because it was a fund raiser for Lutheran social services or because they knew someone in the choir. I wondered if I would ever get to sing for a large group, on a grand stage. I usually sing in Churches, schools, or hospitals. I felt somewhat embarrassed for a moment. I made the mistake of comparing myself to others that I know. Others that have music videos on Youtube. Others that have sang on large stages. Others that are praised on social media. I felt like their grand platforms for performance made my accomplishments small in comparison.
And then I thought to myself, that it was okay. There is no shame in singing in churches. I have sang in several different churches, for several different denominations. I am coming together with people of all different faiths, sharing with them my testimony. I get to sing Alleluia and Hosanna. I get to sing for people during the intimate moments of their lives. I have sang for funerals and weddings, mission farewells and homecomings.

Next week I will be singing with the Nevada Opera Theatre out at Veterans Memorial Cemetery on Memorial Day. It may not be a performance that is filled with fanfare, but it is one that will be filled with honor. I will be singing for the veterans and the families of those that have passed on. I will be singing at the cemetery that my grandparents are buried. I don’t think many people will be there. But what an honor to sing for those that are.

I decided that I would be humble and never be embarrassed again by where I have sang. I get to praise our God and share his love with so many. I may or may not get to sing on a grand stage for lots of people. It's still something I can work towards. And I can feel happy for those that get to. But if I never get to myself, I refuse to feel embarrassed or inferior. Because in the end, it is those intimate moments that mean the most to people. The performance for the small groups in their churches, their homes, outside their hospital room, by a loved one’s grave, etc. Those are the moments that bring hope, light and love of God. And I get to be a part of that.